By Mia

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Life’s Gotten Harder, but God is Always Good



Thanks so much for Psalm 22 this morning – such a wonderful reminder that You have not forgotten me & my family especially as the last few weeks have felt mostly hopeless.

Here’s a review:

  • No new brain symptoms just more intensity that is now causing my right leg to feel a bit  heavier now & then – THANK YOU THAT I DO NOT NEED TO BE IN A WHEELCHAIR!
  • Thank You that I am Miracle for I am still living with brain mets, now 25 tumors from the 15 in July 2012.  Thank You that I’ve surpassed the 13.5 months prognosis of Whole Brain Radiation from June 2011 — this month is my 7th month beyond prognosis!
  • Had to take more dex/steroid as I was having headaches, nausea, vomiting more frequently.  Thank You for helping me learn how to minimize using it so that I will have less side effects of insomnia, & pls. also protect me from its side effect of growing the cancer & anything else.   Pls. bless us financially so I can afford to buy the natural steroid supplement that helped me 2 years ago.
  • Pls. help us figure out what natural protocol will be most effective for the lung since I no longer have the oral chemo.  Give us wisdom to decide.
  • Pls. help me with nutrition & give us ideas with the limited resources available in our community.
  • Pls. grant the provision for me to get the best technology that will strongly support my healing.
My life is in your hands and I am thankful for each day.  Thank You for grace esp. during times I throw tantrums because of weariness or pain…or as what my onco said, symptoms of the 2nd largest tumor behind my right ear?  Thank You that I am still coherent even it seems I moved & think much slower before.  I continue to seek Your healing, O Lord.  Thank You for being my Rock ALWAYS & for giving strength to write of Your marvelous  deeds today.
Your lamb,
Mia aka Miracle

Psalm 22.

For the choir director: A psalm of David, to be sung to the tune “Doe of the Dawn.”

My God, my God, why have you abandoned me?
Why are you so far away when I groan for help?
Every day I call to you, my God, but you do not answer.
Every night you hear my voice, but I find no relief.

Yet you are holy,
enthroned on the praises of Israel.
Our ancestors trusted in you,
and you rescued them.
They cried out to you and were saved.
They trusted in you and were never disgraced.

But I am a worm and not a man.
I am scorned and despised by all!
Everyone who sees me mocks me.
They sneer and shake their heads, saying,
“Is this the one who relies on the Lord?
Then let the Lord save him!
If the Lord loves him so much,
let the Lord rescue him!”

Yet you brought me safely from my mother’s womb
and led me to trust you at my mother’s breast.
10 I was thrust into your arms at my birth.
You have been my God from the moment I was born.

11 Do not stay so far from me,
for trouble is near,
and no one else can help me.
12 My enemies surround me like a herd of bulls;
fierce bulls of Bashan have hemmed me in!
13 Like lions they open their jaws against me,
roaring and tearing into their prey.
14 My life is poured out like water,
and all my bones are out of joint.
My heart is like wax,
melting within me.
15 My strength has dried up like sunbaked clay.
My tongue sticks to the roof of my mouth.
You have laid me in the dust and left me for dead.
16 My enemies surround me like a pack of dogs;
an evil gang closes in on me.
They have pierced my hands and feet.
17 I can count all my bones.
My enemies stare at me and gloat.
18 They divide my garments among themselves
and throw dice[a] for my clothing.

19 O Lord, do not stay far away!
You are my strength; come quickly to my aid!
20 Save me from the sword;
spare my precious life from these dogs.
21 Snatch me from the lion’s jaws
and from the horns of these wild oxen.

22 I will proclaim your name to my brothers and sisters.[b]
I will praise you among your assembled people.
23 Praise the Lord, all you who fear him!
Honor him, all you descendants of Jacob!
Show him reverence, all you descendants of Israel!
24 For he has not ignored or belittled the suffering of the needy.
He has not turned his back on them,
but has listened to their cries for help.

25 I will praise you in the great assembly.
I will fulfill my vows in the presence of those who worship you.
26 The poor will eat and be satisfied.
All who seek the Lord will praise him.
Their hearts will rejoice with everlasting joy.
27 The whole earth will acknowledge the Lordand return to him.
All the families of the nations will bow down before him.
28 For royal power belongs to the Lord.
He rules all the nations.

29 Let the rich of the earth feast and worship.
Bow before him, all who are mortal,
all whose lives will end as dust.
30 Our children will also serve him.
Future generations will hear about the wonders of the Lord.
31 His righteous acts will be told to those not yet born.
They will hear about everything he has done.





By Mia


Categories: Uncategorized

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Finally an update, 7 months & 14 days later…

Daddy God,

Your faithfulness and patience are amazing.  Scanning through this blog just reminded me how truly good you are & have carried our family with your EXTRAVAGANT GRACE.  Since I last posted, you have done so much in me & others around me that I would definitely be unable to describe it all on this post.

You know how much I have wanted to post on this blog many times but either experienced fatigued, lack of time/planning, or frustration with my neurotic netbook.  Thank you that I am finally doing it today and pls. help me to take a few minutes here and there to continue.  On the bright side, thank you for the times our family were able to do Facebook:-)

Your marvelous works continue on from my last Oct ’11 post.  At that time I had a growing intense desire to return home to Guam by December.  I went through some dark days of going through the motions without falling into deeper depression stuggling with the climate and mainland lifestyle.  Thank you for carrying me through and providing an opportunity for Gil & I to be in Guam Dec.31 for two weeks, and I was feverishly praying to be able to stay.  Unfortunately, I could not as a few things were still not in place though You provided some hopeful signs like the help of Guam Cancer Care.

How can I not miss this joy?

With my burning desire for home unrealized, I was quite broken upon returning to SD.  I recalled how upon arrival on Guam Dec. 31st would feel like – would it still feel like home?  And once I landed, I lifted both arms as I proclaimed “I’m home!” with glee feeling very grateful to be embraced by the warm climate.  Throughout our stay there, I enjoyed the fellowship of beloved friends, church and family.  I realized how I truly valued my island community so conducive to building intimate relationships.  I also recalled the time several months earlier in SD going to a Chamorro restaurant.  As I read the menu, I started to tear and be touched by You affirming my Guamanian-ness.  I felt intensely aware of Guam’s significance for Your Kingdom…just like God used a small nation Israel, Abraham’s descendants, to prosper the rest of us with Jesus the Greatest Treasure…So with such fervent attachments to my home island, I felt lost being back in the city of SD.

Lord, thank you for your love & patience these past few months as I waddled with extremely little faith and threw tantrums.  Thank you for continuing to grip me despite my lethargy and doubts.  Thank you for giving us a great church community far and near that prayed us through our struggles & provided sound teaching to help us see YOUR EXTRAVAGANT LOVE & GRACE no matter our depravity.  You have wooed me once again like You have before.  I’m forever grateful.

Thank you for continuing to increase my strength gradually despite the fatigue caused by my medication/condition.  Thank you that I was able to go to L.A. with my family on May 5th for the first time since being on the mainland.  What an awesome reminder of Your Sensational Sovereignty of orchestrating this perfect day.  It started with my sporadic moments on FB when I visited a former student’s wall (out of many) and I noticed that he now lived in SD.  I was so excited that I immediately posted, and within minutes, 2 other former students did so as well.  One of them was Sean, the only other Pinoi at www.Makualani.com when I taught there (03-05).

He invited me to his APU graduation.  We were free on Saturday so our family decided to plan a day in LA.  On that perfect day, we awoke early and left home before 8am.  During the drive north, I kept turning my neck towards the back to Xan & Kci.  I got carsick & vomited…no more head turning after that!  Lord, thank You for blessing me to remain calm, clean up, feel better & enjoy that perfect day.  We met up with MuiKee in Biola & enjoyed reminiscing as we took pictures throughout campus.  The boys also picked out Mother’s Day presents for me at the Biola Bookstore – a Biola denim jacket from Xan & a small stuffed animal Biola Eagle from Kci.

Biola, the Perfect Place to be inspired to learn for God’s glory in all things!

After that eventful morning, You worked out for us a special lunch and fellowship with Tita Peggy & Tito Ed in Brea.  We were all so delighted with the feast they lovingly prepared as we caught up in each other’s lives.  It was a joy to learn how You are blessing all their loved ones as we saw Ate Sa’s wedding pictures and her daughter Sophia’s antics on Lola Peggy’s iPad.  Gil & I even found our guest book entries during our courtship days:-)  And to top off that restful afternoon, we were engrossed in Tita Peggy’s joyful chatter about the old days, Dad and other topics I have come to love anytime I’m in the presence of Cepedayans:-)  It was a memorable time of connecting savoring the fanciful CrisostomoPatio…Lord, please bless us with such a place someday:-)

A Perfect Picture for a Perfect Day with Tita Peggy & Tito Ed

In the late afternoon, we visited the Palace in the Sky (a.k.a. The Getty Center -not the Malibu one).  What a glorious weather You blessed us with as we frolicked in the architectural masterpiece that took 13 years to build.  In the evening, You magnificently brought me, Anna, Sean, Liz, Kim & Mitch for a brief & happy reunion amidst a very crowded stadium!  What a perfect day indeed – above what I could ever ask for or imagine.  Gil, Xan, Kci, Gina & I all agreed it was a perfect day with a perfect soundtrack (a CD I made for the road trip).

A Perfect Place for Thinking & Playing

Proud former M/HS Teacher with her Perfectly Brilliant Students!

So many things have happened that reveal your lovingkindness to us.  I hope You will enable me to post them so I may declare Your good works.  Today, I saw the post below on FB and felt the need to share.  Lord, please meet their needs as You know what they are.  In Jesus’ name, Amen.

From K:

Share this request with your prayer groups and continue in prayer. Often times, prayer is a process and we must be diligent in our supplications. Our prayers are sweet incense to The Lord. Prayer is not a ‘one-time-deal.’

Please pray for Martha. Please pray for God’s will and glory to be manifested through this. Please pray for my son, Jonathan. He is frightened and in unbelief; angry with God and in denial.

I am going to visit her and share the Lord with her again. Please pray her heart opens even wider. Pray that her unbelief and faith in things not of God be bound. Although she was raised Catholic, I feel compelled to share the Word with her and to lay hands on her. I felt The Spirit guide me to pray and have her present herself to her physicians. Two acts of faith, if you will.

Please join me in praying for her healing. Intercede with me. Let us all be bold and approach His throne with faith and expect Him to be faithful to His word.

Thank you.